And then, there was a surprise :)

If you've wondered why I've been insanely quiet in the blog world, this might clue you in... Although I've been writing this post in my head for a couple of months (a little over 3, to be exact), I still have no clue how to get into this topic.

So, lets just start with a brief apology...

I am one of the most cautious people alive, so therefore, I have a tendency to get scared of jinxing any type of good news that comes mine or Kevin's way.  As a result, I'm beyond sorry that I've been holding out on you all (and anyone else that I have yet to pass this news along to..) about what is going on in our lives.  

So... as it turns out.....

We're expecting baby Gray the 1st week of June!

Shew. And there you go :)
I would have come clean with this fantastic news a bit earlier, the thought of making a massive public announcement about my life via facebook or twitter is just not my forte.  Plus, lets be honest, I think we can all admit, people have become far too open with all of the intimate details of their lives on all facets of social media, especially as it relates to pregnancy.  Example: Do I want to hear about how your baby was conceived?  Hell no.  Do I want to see your positive pregnancy test urine sticks?  Absolutely not.  Thats so foul.  Do I want to see your naked stomach at every stage (ew) of your pregnancy? Umm, ew. Just eww.  I don't care if you are Megan Fox, super in shape, & smoking hot-- I feel like that is an intimate type of thing that should only be shared with your significant other or family.  
 To each their own I guess, but its just not my thing.

In turn, because I'm so hesitant & super-stitous about sharing the intimate details of my life, I contemplated just completely avoiding the whole topic of my pregnancy on my blog, but then I thought that was pretty ridiculous.  This blog is about my life, so I doubt my posts would have much substance if I completely avoided it.

HOWEVER, I can promise you all that you will not see any type of ultrasound or belly progression pictures on my blog. I don't exactly enjoy looking at them, so Im going to assume that other people feel the same way.  Obviously, you might see the occasional picture of me pop up on here during these next few months, but I swear, it won't be any type of preggo picture montage :)

I finally started thinking it might be fun to give an honest view about being pregnant.  Because believe you me, anyone that says pregnancy is a cakewalk, is straight LYING to you.  Or if people try to claim that you'll feel more beautiful when you're pregnant, just hit them in their teeth.  Again, complete BS.
As a result to all of the insane stuff people say about being pregnant, I really feel like it is my calling to blog about these next 6 months in the most blunt manner possible, while adding in a bit of humor, no doubt :)

To close, We are so incredibly thrilled about baby Gray coming into our lives.  My excitement level is through the roof, and I cannot wait to tell yall about some of the craziness & hilarity that I'm sure will ensue along this journey.  I just ask you all for some prayers during these following months, as Kev & I truly appreciate them in advance :)

So, with that, only 6 months (or less) to go!!! 

Jan-isms

Continuing on with my November project on the various things I'm thankful for....

Today, I am incredibly thankful for......

Jan-isms

Definition: the hilarious actions/sayings/habits of my Mother, Jan.

For those of you who have followed my blog for awhile or know my family, one thing that is evident is that I am extremely close to both of my parents.  Its interesting because in high school, my parents were the epitome of strict parents.  No joke, I had the earliest curfew and most rules of any of my friends.  I considered it controlling, they considered it their way of ensuring I stayed alive until I was 18.  Seeing how I'm still kicking at age 27, I guess there was some legitimacy to their madness.  

Anywho, I maintain that they exerted so much energy into being "super-parents" while I was in high school, the minute I went to college, they were absolutely finished being parents.  Instead, they quickly morphed into some type of mythical creature, known as the friend formerly known as my parent(s).  

Ohhh you know, just Pat & Jan, getting their groove on.
At my wedding.
Classic.

So, as a result of this change, Pat & Jan have become increasingly more entertaining over the past 9 years.  I usually tell people that Pat & Jan are two 24 year olds, trapped in 58 year old bodies.  They are much cooler than I am, seeing how my Dad tells me what music to buy off itunes, the best new tv shows, & what new apps to download, while Jan tells me the latest fashion trends.    

But I digress... I am thankful for both of my parents.  However, I am REALLLLLLLYYYYYYY

grateful for all of my mother's hilariousness, especially because its untended to be hilarious 99% of the time.  

Allow me to provide you with some examples:

1) "I'M A CHILD OF THE DEPRESSION"

So obviously, as I mentioned previously, Jan is 58.  She wasn't even alive during the Great Depression.  She wasn't even in the womb during the Great Depression, but don't worry, she still has SCARS from its aftermath.  Jan will honestly save any AND all food that comes her way.  Her refrigerator is kind of like a big box of (sometimes not so great) tin foil surprises.  (She may or may not have saved taco bell & ate it for dinner later on that week, after we brought it home one late cocktail-laden night...) Anything that can be put in the freezer, will be saved for at least 6+ months.  Milk?  Cheese? Chili from last year?  No problem!  Jan's house has got to be one of the government's top 10 safe places if we ever have bomb threats because she could feed an army w/ her food supply.  

2) "CAROLINE- HOW DO YOU SPELL ORANGE?"

Maybe its because shes from a very very very very small town in Western Kentucky & they didn't believe in vocabulary testing, but sweet Jan would definitely never ever qualify for any type of spelling contests.  Keep in mind, she is an RN, so lord knows shes a smart cookie when it comes to science, but I definitely would not trust her with teaching my children how to spell.  Over the years, she has asked me to spell the following words for her: Orange, successful, embarrassing, succinct, provolone (except she pronounces it provolonEY), Gray (as in my last name), and that is just to name a few.  If you want to laugh, just imagine what her texts look like because she talks in nurse abbreviations & avoids spelling out anything.

3) "I just already really miss Doron Lamb. He was just so cute.  If he stayed around another year, I think we could've been great friends."

Like any good Kentucky girl, Jan LOOOOVEESSS her some Kentucky basketball.  I'm not going to lie, it kind of stung to lose everyone to the NBA this year.  I'm certain we will grow to love our team, but right now, I think all of us still kind of miss our boys in blue from last year.  Jan, after a couple of cocktails, began talking about how she really didn't miss the whole team from last year.  Nope nope nope.  Jan JUST misses Doron Lamb.  In Jan's words, "I just think he was the cute glue that held everything together.  I can just tell he was a lot of fun.  And soooo cute. Honestly, you guys,  I really think if he would have stayed around for another year, we could've been friends.  I mean, I'm really fun too."  

Bahahahaha, there are just no words for that little monologue.  Gotta love her honesty & modesty though, right?

4) "AM I DOING THIS RIGHT?!?.... Can you SEEEEE me?!?"

Jan + technology = epic disaster.  Anything technologically advanced just absolutely overwhelms Miss Jan. You know the copy/paste function that is an absolute basic action on any computer?  This action just blows Jan's mind.  Changing fonts?  Holy hell, you might as well ask her to translate Egyptian.  

However, we were pleasantly surprised about how well she has managed to do with her iphone.  Homegirl can completely navigate her apps, surf the web, and text people like a pro off of that bad boy.  Its amazing how well she does with it.  

Of course, that was with her 3GS.  She upgraded to the 4S.  Anyone want to guess what is still rocking her world on the 4S?

If you guessed FACETIME, you get a gold star from me!  Now, she has mastered calling me on facetime, but she forgets that I can actually SEE everything she is doing while were on it.  Or she forgets how to rotate the camera when shes trying to show me something in her house.    

The funniest aspect of Jan on facetime is that she still is so utterly fascinated by it, and gets huge kicks out of it EVERY time we do it.  

As evidenced by the picture, Jan + facetime = the ridiculousness of if you gave a camera to a 4 year old, but even funnier because shes a grown woman.  If you know Jan & have facetime, I highly recommend you giving her a ring.  It will definitely be worth your while.

In conclusion, I am incredibly blessed & thankful that Jan is my Momma.  Trust me, there is no other human-being on this Earth like her.  Her Jan-isms make my life infinitely better & make my days filled with laughter.  I just hope I can be half the Mom to my kids that Jan has been to me.

Okay, that about wraps it up for me.  Have a fabulous weekend!  Get excited for Thanksgiving next week! woooo hooooo!!!

November Post #2- I'm thankful for not getting kicked out of Old Navy

No, I didn't pull a Lindsey Logan & give myself a 5 finger discount. Oh no, instead, I put on an Oscar winning performance about my severe distaste over Kev's latest (& hands down most ridiculous/clownie) move to date, while in a public place.
Before I make it seem like I've completely gone off the deep end, let me go back just a bit & fill you in on all the details...
My sweet Momma came into visit me on Friday night, which is always a solid time. Her visits usually consist of quality Jan/Carol time, which includes really good meals & shopping. After enjoying a fabulous meal on Friday night, we got an early start to our very mapped-out shopping agenda on Saturday morning.
We were literally gone 30 mins & my mom gets a phone call from Kev. I should have known he had monumentally screwed up when Jan kept walking away from me & literally hiding from me in Old Navy.
Finally, she finds me & says "Kevin is okay. He's been in a minor accident."
Of course I immediately go into hyperventilating mode, thinking that something is horribly wrong  with my husband, ie: concussion, broken limb, etc.  

But then Miss Jan quickly follows up with,

 "He backed into my car. In your drive-way." 

Hold the flipping phone.
He backed into a PARKED CAR THAT HE KNEW WAS THERE?
Better yet-
He backed into a parked car even though his SUV has a BACK UP CAMERA?!?

Kev's Car

Back up- Camera in Kev's car.
AM I MISSING SOMETHING?!?

Are you serious?
No wonder my mom was trying to hide this news from me. I wasn't just a little upset. I was Britney Spears with an umbrella & shaved head, circa 2007 angry.

GRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!

Now, I know mistakes happen. However, for those of you who are married, how insanely annoying is it to tell your spouse something 849592940 times, and have them ignore you, only to reap the repercussions for ignoring you at a later date?  Welcome to my Saturday morning. 
Kevin will even vouch for the fact that I have honestly yelled at him for months that  he doesn't pay close enough attention when he backs out of our driveway, and that he needs to fix these driving habits ASAP. With the vast number of kids on our street, it always worries me that he won't be paying attention & run over someone/something.  On this particular Saturday, Kev was far too busy getting amped up to watch UK lose yet another game &/ or checking out how he looked in his game Day attire to either check out his mirrors or BACK UP CAMERA.  Sweet Jesus. 


Anywho, while my Mom was trying to console Kevin about his driving blunder, I was in the background, using choice language for his actions, along with vigorously texting him about how he should listen to me more often.  
Thank GOD, it was early in the day & not very many people were around, because God knows I made a scene.
  
Obviously, I did calm down after awhile, but the scene I made in Old Navy was pretty ugly & I am not proud of it at all.  
To keep my November Project going, I just want to say that I am incredibly grateful for the kind people of Old Navy for understanding me wanting to karate chop my husband, and not calling SECURRRRIIITY on my crazy self.

Again, while Kevin's ditzy driving moves are kind of funny now, I did not see the humor on Saturday.  So, I am also thankful for my Mom for not only dealing with my 20 kinds of bat Sh** craziness, but also still wanting to hang out with me after my tiny outburst(s).

Jan!!!!!

Anyway,  I know this isn't the normal "what I'm thankful for in November" post, but tough cookies :)  My life isn't exactly normal half the time, so my posts regarding my gratitude probably won't be either.  Ha!  Anyway, that about wraps it up for me on this Monday.   Be sure to check back with what the November forces me to be thankful for next!!

A November Project- Really Giving Thanks :)

Those who know me well in the blogging world have known that I have been struggling with some major writer's block these past few months.  (And excessively whining about it too, just ask Pink Lou Lou and The Bargain Blonde.  I've been borderline obnoxious about my frustrations.  Love you 2 for sticking with me :)   ) While I have been cough busy? cough with my pinterest projects & cooking, I've also just been suffering from a total and complete brain freeze.

So, since its November (can you believe it??), which month contains Thanksgiving, aka my favorite holiday, I thought I would pay it homage by blogging this whole about the simple things I'm grateful for in my life.  

I know, I know, its kind of trendy & overdone, but lets face it: I think we'd all lead much happier lives if we focused on the things that we're thankful for instead of wishing for the things we don't have.  **Side note**- My mom actually did this for a WHOLE year.  While I consider myself a very blessed person, I'm afraid if I tried that, I'd wind up with posts like, "Today I'm thankful for not punching (Fill in blank)'s teeth in.  Or "Today I'm thankful for people not talking to me in offices, " etc.  So instead of chancing myself getting salty during these posts, I thought I'd just try for a month to see how it goes...)

Soooo, here we go.

What I'm thankful for on November 1st.....

As goofy as this sounds, I'm truly grateful for Halloween & Trick or Treaters.  We live in a HUGE subdivision, so every year, it is a production.  On average, we typically have to spend between $50-70 on candy because there are SOOOOO many kids in our neighborhood.  While some people (ahem, I'm lookin at you, Kevin Gray), get a bit grumpy about having to supply such an ample amount of sweet treats, it inevitably winds up being a really fun night.  

And last night was no different, nor would I want it to be.  Below is a pic of our sidewalk at one point last night....

HOLY CUTE COSTUMES!!!

Seriously- how much fun is that??  While debby downer Kev tried his hardest to not be into it, the funny kids in our neighborhood eventually won him over by the end of the night.  Lets be honest- its kind of hard to stay cynical when you've got little kids dressed up as Bengals' Football players, Power Rangers (who knew they were still popular, right??), and bumblebees at your door, asking for candy :)  Plus, you should note that we have the parents in the background, sipping on adult beverages, making it that much more entertaining of a night. I've said it once, and I'll say it again- I ADORE Halloween & I'm truly thankful that I get to live in a neighborhood that celebrates it with such gusto. 

Oh... and one other reason why I am thankful for Halloween? 

Nooooo, I swear, its not just because of the left over candy. (Although, that is an added bonus, aside from the fact I have no self restraint.  My wrapper piles are embarrassing.)

In reality, 

Halloween actually holds a special place in my heart because mine & Kev's first "real date" was to a Chi O Halloween Date party, over 6 years ago.

Don't you love the throw-back pic?? So hot. Wait.. no.

So, obviously, I will forever be grateful to this silly Holiday because without it, I might have never fallen for a boy dressed up as a wounded patient :)

Well, that about does it for me.  Be sure to check in all this month now that I've found SOMETHING to blog about again :) 

Delectable Details

Ever since I finished my MBA, I've been promising myself I will blog more. Yet... That hasn't happened.
Why might that be? Honestly- I'm just going to full & completely blame Pinterest. I think I had pinned 749592940 things while I was in school, so now all of my free time is devoted to crafting & cooking.
Has everything turned out great?
Hellllllls no. Unless you ask my mother Who loves everything i do, I'd say my craft projects have about a 40% success rate.
My recipes, on the other hand, have more like a 90% success rate.
Don't worry y'all, I don't get too crazy or gourmet like with my cooking by any means. But honestly, even before Pinterest (GASP, can you picture your life without it now? I...can't even go there.  That thought terrifies me.) I have always thoroughly enjoyed cooking. For me, I feel like cooking dinner (& whatever else) is almost therapeutic.  I actually even cook in complete silence, if you can believe it. Kev snapped this picture a few weeks ago because he relishes  marvels the fact I can be so content by myself for an hour or so every night :)

Anyway, I know I've said it before & I'll say it again, but finding recipes that please both Kev & myself can be a bit of a nightmare headache challenge because he has the eating habits of an 11 year old. Like an 11 year old that prefers Pizza over Filet Mignon.  However, through lots of encouragement & a bit of pushing from yours truly, homeboy has come a loooong way. Just ask him :)  I mean, when he ate peas for the first time, you would have thought he had found a cure for cancer.
So if you deal with choosey kids (or have an insanely picky husband like myself), here are some sure fire crowd pleaser recipes that will make everyone happy :)


Pleasing Pinterest-Inspired Recipes

Fried Rice
INGREDIENTS
-1-2 boil in a bag white rice, cooked
-1 bag peas & carrots, cooked as directed on packaging for 5-7 minutes w/ salt, pepper & butter
-1 cup chopped onion
-2 cloves garlic
-2 tablespoons of olive oil (Honestly-any kind of oil would do)
-2 eggs, beaten
-1/2 cup teriyaki sauce

INSTRUCTIONS
-Heat the oil in skillet for 3-4 minutes on Medium heat
-Add the chopped onion, garlic, and peas/Carrot mix & sautee for 5 minutes.
-Scramble the two eggs, using either one side of the skillet (you can push over your veggie mix), or you could use another skillet to do this.  I'm super lazy, so I just scrambled it in the same pan.
-Once scrambled, mix it in with the veggie mix.
-Add & mix in your cooked rice (I typically cook the rice while I'm sauteeing everything together)
-Pour in your 1/2 cup of Teriyaki sauce, and mix everything up.  
AND YOUR'RE DONE :)
*I usually have Kevin marinate & grill some chicken to have with this, but I could honestly eat it plain.  It is that delicious!!*

Sooooo Good!!!

One additional note-- I highly HIGHLY recommend using this specific type of teriyaki sauce- it can be found in the "international" aisle at the grocery store.  It is phenom.  

Pinterest Inspired Recipe #2

Spicy Chicken w/ Peas Rigatoni

Ingredients

-3 tablespoons olive oil

-1/2 tablespoon of crushed red pepper

- 1/4 teaspoon of salt & pepper

- 2 Medium cloves of garlic

-Two chicken breasts, cooked & shredded (I usually bake my chicken at 400 degrees, for about 35-40 mins, and then shred it.  Much better flavor vs. boiling it)

-1 jar marinara sauce (I prefer Ragu, parmesan & romano)

-1 Jar Alfredo sauce

-1 cup of early/young peas, cooked w/ salt & butter

-3/4 box of cooked penne pasta (honestly- again- any pasta would work, minus lasagna sheets or jumbo shells)

INSTRUCTIONS

-Let olive oil heat in large pot for 3-4 minutes, then sautee all of the spices together until cooked through.

-Add cooked/shredded chicken in with the spices & mix together thoroughly.

-Add cooked peas in with chicken mixture

-Drain pasta & add in with chicken/pea mixture.  Mix well.

-Add both jars of sauces.

-AND YOU'RE DONE :)

*Top with mozzarella* 

SOOOOOO YUMMY.  

Andddd... for the grand finale...

Jan's Red Chili Recipe (perfected by Caroline)

 *Side note- You all should feel incredibly special that I'm sharing this amazingness with you.  This recipe has been adjusted numerous times over the years & it is now simply the most perfect Red chili recipe you will EVER ever try.  I promise.  Kev said this recipe even trumps his mother's recipe (ear muffs, Pat G!- This is the only item he says this about.), which is pretty much the highest praise a wife could ever get from their husband as it pertains to cooking!*

INGREDIENTS

-1 onion, chopped

-2 cloves of garlic

-1.5-2lbs of ground beef

-2 cans of diced, chili ready tomatoes

-3 cans of chili beans (2 hot, 1 medium)

-1 1/2 Tablespoons of chili powder

-1 teaspoon cumin

-1 teaspoon of salt

-1 teaspoon of black pepper

-1/2-1 teaspoon of white pepper (best kick there is!)

-1 teaspoon of cinnamon

-2-3 teaspoons of sugar or brown sugar (I usually do a bit of both)

-1 teaspoon oregano

-1 Teaspoon basil

-1/2 box of elbow macaroni (optional- as I know not everyone likes pasta in their chili)

-1 cup water, as needed

INSTRUCTIONS

-Brown onion, garlic, and beef together, until meat has browned.

-Drain off grease

-Add beans, tomatoes, & spices.

-Let marinate together for 1 hour or so (**personally, I think it just gets better & better the longer it sits**)

-Add in water (as needed-you might not need the whole cup of water, or you might need more. It just depends)

-Add in cooked elbow mac.

-Let sit for 15 mins & serve

-And you're done!!

**TWO MAJOR NOTES- I typically taste my chili about 20 times while I make it.  I seriously always wind up adding a bit more of the various spices listed above, depending on what I think it needs.  I also make Kevin taste it numerous times, so I can get the taste just right.  It SHOULD wind up having a twinge of sweetness w/ a pretty big kick of spice.  If not, just keep adding more/less of those spices**

With cold weather fixing to invade Kentucky this weekend, these recipes are the perfect solution to a good home-cooked meal.  I hope yall enjoy them as much as Kev & I have :)

And as always- if you have any questions regarding any ingredients or instructions, please don't hesitate to reach out to me!

With that, I hope yall have a fantastic Friday!!  

A Few Friday Fascinations

I swear to our good Lord that I have not been avoiding my blog.  I just have had the absolute worse case of writers' block ever.  I literally fall asleep thinking about what I could/should write about, and I draw complete blanks.
Finally, by the grace of God, I realized that it was my obligation to share with you all a few random obsessions that I have had as of late...http://youtu.be/xz3IdiYJ-sk
1. Hair Screws
We all know I love a good up-do, especially one with a Faux Braid (here's a quick tutorial for those of you all who haven't mastered that little trick quite yet)



However, lets face it- unless we wake up super early to have mass quantities of time on our hands before we go to work in the morning, I am alllllllll about easy w/ mahh hair in the am.

Enter hair screws. 

These bad boys run about $6-8 dollars, and you can find them practically anywhere that sells shampoo. Seriously.  I saw them at Kroger, if that tells you anything.

Not only are they cheap, they are extremely easy to use... 

Let me demonstrate (no tutorial- sorry yall- my phone was fixin to die, so pics will have to do today.)

I swear to everything holy & pizza that this is the easiest up-do of all time.  

INSTRUCTIONS

1. Lift hair up like you were going to put your hair into a pony tail

2. Twist around & make the bun shape

3. Insert screws into an x shape into the little twist bun you created.

4. Just kidding, there is no #4. Its that easy. 20 seconds, tops.

Suck it, Sock Bun :) 

2. Talbots Outlet

No, my 58 year old mother did not just hijack my computer, you read that correctly.  For professional clothing that has a bit of style & classiness, you honestly cannot beat that outlet store.  It is phenomenal, I am obsessed with it, and I'm not even going to apologize for loving it so much. I'd like to tell you I'm mildly embarrassed that I see 62 year old women shopping there every time I go, but I mean, honestly- those senior citizens obviously know whats up bc the place rocks. I bought ALL of the following clothing (including the dress in the beach pic) for $92. 

Gotta Love some great clothes at senior citizen pricing :)

3. Loreal Nail Polish

So, I'm uptight with OPI & Essie because I honestly think their polish doesn't stay on very well.  I promise to yall that I am not cheap in the slightest, but I refuse to pay $8-$9 for polish that doesn't stay on.  Here lately, all I have been buying is Loreal.  Their fall polish colors are on point & only about $4.

Check out what color I've been sporting this week (and yes--- i'm well aware my fingers look identical to a 12 year old boy, but what can you do?) :)

Why hello, Greycian Goddess.

It is seriously my favorite Gray color of the season. Its not too dark or harsh, which I love.  I know neutral/dark colors are super trendy but I gotta be blunt-- sometimes staring super dark polish day in & day out just kind of depresses me & makes me want to start on a round of prozac. Just saying :)

4. Fallll lalalalaaa la la la laaaaaa

Typically?  I live for Fall.  We've got a bit of colder weather, jeans, pumpkin spice lattes, bourbon, etc. (ha, who am I kidding? I live in Kentucky--> we drink bourbon alllll year long. Those of you not from here should follow suit.. it will make your life infinitely better.)

However, my fall (because I am married to THE super fan of the University of Kentucky) hasn't been too fun, due to my Wildcats being embarrassingly bad at Football this year.  And believe you me, super fan is NOT fun to be around when his beloved wildcats are losing on a weekly basis.  

Anyways, I've just gone ahead & focused my efforts straight into Christmas.

Thanks to my boredom of now routinely skipping UK Football games, I have channeled my energy into creating various random Holiday items.  While I'm going to do a full post about the random Pinterest stuff I've made for Thanksgiving/Christmast/NYE, I'll give you a quick preview.

Fabulous, Fun, & For the Frugal :)

INSTRUCTIONS
1. Buy a pack of plain glass ornaments, fun tissue paper & coordinating ribbon, & modge podge
2. Modge podge those suckers
3. Use your fun tissue paper, and stick it alllll over the ornament
4. Paint a layer of modge podge all the tissue paper covered ornament
5. let dry, add a bow, and you're finished!

Even if your team is having a stellar season (unlike my poor Cats), these are still super fun to make & could be fantastic little gifts for the upcoming Holiday season!!

Alright yall, thats about all I've got in me tonight.  Hope everyone has had a fantastic week & has an even better weekend! I know I'm ready to get mine rolling asap :)  Mmwwwa!

20 Kinds of Crazy

My first inclination was to do a post devoted to a recent ridiculous and insanely high school-esque hometown happening that completely reaffirms my decision to never move home.  However, I resolved long ago to never use my blog as a retaliation tool of any sort, and I intend to keep that vow.  BUT, I would like to take a minute to personally thank certain parties for allowing me to have such control on your life from 100 miles away.

Just let me know if there is anything else I can do for you :) xoxo

And that's that.

While I really could tell all kinds of super crazy & unreal stories from my hometown, I will refrain.  For now :)

Instead, I'm going to opt to tell some of my fav crazy stories that have occurred while at work....

Crazy Happening #1: 

Person One: "You know, I'm thinkin about pursuing a career as a cop or ranger.  I feel like its my calling."

Me: "I hear that law enforcement & public service positions can be an extremely rewarding career option.  Do you think you could handle yourself pretty well in unpredictable situations?"

Person One: "Absolutely.  I mean, I didn't even cry or try to hit any of the cops during any of the times I've gotten arrested."

Me: "Ohh? Umm.  Doesn't a career in law enforcement require some background checks and additional education?"

Person One: "Yeah, it does.  And once I get my license back from it being suspended from my 3rd DUI, I'm going start those back up.  Those cops that arrested me should be scared." 

Me: (In all seriousness)- "I mean, if I was one of them, I would be."

And that, ladies & gentlemen, is what you call perseverance. Or a potential restraining order?

Crazy Happening #2

Scenario- This person had been frequenting this particular place of business entirely too much, which caused her to get permanently kicked out.  So, her comments occurred while she found this out.

Person Two: (Looking me up & down) "It must absolutely suck to get up & have to work every day."

Me: "Umm, I actually just consider myself lucky to have a good job that I love, so no- it actually doesn't suck at all.  So, how are you fortunate enough to not have to work for a living?"

Person Two : "The Government says I don't have to.  Everyone knows that if you have ADHD, you don't have to work for a living."

Me: "Thats so weird.  I happen to know a ton of people with ADHD that have a full time job, including myself.  

Person Two: (Immediately after she was told she could not come back as a customer...) She turns to me & the manager & SCREAMS, "You know what?  You all just keeeeep on WORKING, so I DON'T HAVE TO!!!!!"

And people wonder why I'm conservative in my political views. 

Crazy Happening #3

Scenario:  My work partner & I were discussing wedding planning with a customer, and we figured out that someone at their office was fixing to get married.  Obviously, Leslie & I immediately had to ask her 834590245089 questions about her upcoming nuptials.

Leslie: "Sooo, I just LOVE weddings.  What are your colors?!?"

Person Three: "OMG, I am so excited.. Its going to be Green & Yellow!!!"

Me: "Well, thats an interesting choice.  Those are actually my high school colors!  I would have never thought about them as wedding colors though.  Hmmm.

Person Three: "Reeeallly? Never?  Well, I mean, its a JOHN DEERE THEMED WEDDING, so naturally, our colors have to be green & yellow."

Leslie: (Kicking me under the table to stop my incessant giggling), "So, how are you going to integrate both colors in your wedding party, exactly?  Like green bridesmaids dresses?  Yellow dresses? "

Person Three: "Wellll, I really want the theme to SHINE through during the whole wedding, sooo its going to be alternating bridesmaids dresses. You know, Greeen, Yellaaa, Greeen, Yellaaa, Greeen, Yellaaa, Greeeen.  And THEN, our aisle runner is going to have little John Deer Green Tractors on it."

Me: "Leslie, Don't you think that is the MOST FANTASTIC IDEA YOU'VE EVER HEARD!?!?  I think you should submit all your wedding pictures to The Knot, along w/ Martha Stewart Weddings, etc!! Leslie- don't you think she would be a shoe-in?"

Leslie: "Umm, errr. ummm.. uhh. I'm just having a hard time picturing it, but I'm sure it will be one for the books."

bahahahahaha

Believe it or not, we are still friends, despite me throwing her under the big green tractor bus :)

Talk about the very essence of supreme wedding style.  Just stunning.

I legitimately envision this fabric as her aisle runner, don't yall??

P.S. I would pay BIG money to see pictures of that wedding.

P.S.S. LESLIE, I'd love you forever if you pulled some strings w/ our old accounts, & found those pictures for me.  It'd be a great Christmas present.  Just saying :)

Sooooo, as yall can see, I have enough crazy that occurs at work on a daily regular basis to worry about  much of anything else :)

I've been having some major writer's block lately, soooo thats alllll I've got today.

Hope everyone is having a fabulous week!!