Monday, February 25, 2013

Shopaholic + Baby = Terrible News

Hi.  My name is Caroline & I'm a shopaholic.  




Like, I can't leave a store without buying something.
Add in some pregnancy hormones & knowing the sex of my child, that addiction is easily amplified my 1000000.  

Do you have that image in your head?  Great.  Now add in the fact that I am a complete A type personality & am psychotic about planning out every second of my life.
Again, add in some pregnancy hormones, which magnifies the intensity of my personality by 200000.

I know, poor Kevin, right?  

Ha, believe it or not, he actually thinks being pregnant has made me a nicer person.  Maybe this is because I cry at every sappy commercial on tv?  (PS- I wish there was a way to block the ASPCA commercials.  I firmly believe that Sarah McLaughlin & Willie Nelson have a plot going against pregnancy girls because by God, they know how to prey on my hormones.  I try to convince Kevin to give to ASPCA at least twice a week, through my weeping. So attractive.)



Anywho, they say nesting comes in the 3rd trimester.  Ummm, I don't know who "they are," but "they" are hugely mistaken.  This girl has been all over "Nesting" since day one.
Also, I'm kind of unsure why they call it "nesting."  I call it "Actually being prepared for your child."  Crazy concept, huh?  Professionals crack me up with their crazy terms.  Actually, maybe they coin these terms to make pregnant women feel less crazy?  Hmmm. Theres a thought.
Regardless, I just keep trying to convince myself that my compulsive shopping is 100% normal.  Especially if my baby purchase is a bargain.
Its NOT my fault that sleep sacks, swaddles, and bottle racks all sell for under $10 at TJ MAXX.
You can't pass up deals like that, yall. Right?



However, I guess I hadn't really been keeping track of everything I had bought for our new addition, until I organized it all in his closet.


OH.




MY. 







GOD.

I mean.... does this look like a future episode of Hoarders, or what?  I'm kind of concerned that Kevin is going to stage an intervention for my shopping habits sometime in the near future.  So, I've tried  to cut back & restrain myself from buying baby items every time I see them.

And while I'm well aware I look like an obsessive first time parent (which is probably a fairly accurate assessment, now that I'm thinking about it....), I do have a legitimate reason for little man's closet looking like a mini Babies R Us.  I swear.

The reason being is that shopping for yourself absolutely BLOWS when you are pregnant.
1) People fail to warn you how incredibly unfun shopping for maternity clothes actually is.  In addition, people also fail to mention how hideous most maternity clothes are.  The ONLY hidden benefit are the pants, which are insanely comfortable- even dress pants.  I'm not entirely convinced that I'll ever really want to go back to my normal pants after wearing these bad boys.
2) You all know I am a huge sucker for make-up.  Like, the amount of points that I've accrued on my Sephora and Ulta Cards are almost embarrassing because of their high amount.  However, once you get knocked up, you don't exactly feel gorgeous, so you don't really want to run out & buy make-up.
Seems kind of counter intuitive, no?  It seems like make-up would help you feel prettier, but oddly enough, it just doesnt really work that way.  At least not for me anyways.
3) All fun aspects of shoe & purse shopping also instantly disappear once you get pregnant, mainly because you feel guilty about any crazy expensive purchases.  This whole guilt concept is an entirely new feeling to me, and I can't say I'm a fan.  However, I just can't rationalize $500 on a bag knowing that we could have bought something important for little man with that money.

Who AM I???

In turn, I think I'm going to just need to surrender my debit and credit cards to my sweet husband until we have this child.
Otherwise, we might wind up bankrupt :)

Bahahahahaha.  That about does it for me. Hope yall have a great week!!